Responding to some comments/questions

A couple of you were curious about the weekly transition from trucker to "civilian", particularly the different driving experiences. The truck is, duh, heavier and we sit higher up in the air. No matter what vehicle I habitually drive, over time it gets to feel like an extension of my body, or my feeling of personal size adjusts to encompass what I am driving. With the truck, it has been really difficult to "incorporate" the trailer (see the "Physics" entry). I "wear" the tractor more comfortably. I am a really big guy who looks far ahead and looks down on the little cars. I am slow to accelerate and slow to decelerate, especially when loaded. Unloaded, tractor and trailer weigh ~ 29,000 lbs. Loaded, 70,000 to 78,000 lbs. We truckers would like you to be very aware of this when you are tempted to cut in front of us and apply your brakes. As much as I would like to avoid crushing you, slowing that mass takes more time and distance than slowing your car. I will feel really bad and you will be dead, so please choose accordingly and don't take it personally.

Talking with Ben today I was able to articulate that the view is both grossly and subtly different from truck to car. Grossly, height allows us to look around a lot, and safety demands we look far ahead. In a car, the road is closer and I am more nimble, though it is now habit to look far ahead no matter what I drive. Subtly, I have become accustomed while driving a car to perceiving my place in the lane from a certain angle, which determines my judgment as to how centered in the lane I am. It has taken me a long time, and I am still learning, how to judge my placement in the lane while driving a truck. The angle of view is different, for one thing, so that I have had to learn to keep more to the left portion of the lane, and look at the left half as "center" rather than my more customary view from a car of what center is. Additionally, all trailers cant slightly to the right, front to rear, so truck drivers need to cheat to the left a little for that reason, also. The next time you follow a truck, look along its length and you'll see what I mean.

The transition from trucker to civilian, driving aside, is evolving. In September, it was two completely separate worlds and identities. One was harsh, the other comfortable. Now, at the beginning of December, I feel more like the same person all week, and am more comfortable in general.

Folks ask me if I like driving a truck, or, in some cases, assume my life is much more difficult than it was before. There are aspects of truck driving I like, and I am liking more now that I am not anxious or terrified most of the time. I enjoy introducing myself as a truck driver, and find I can bring many aspects of myself to this work. I am learning a lot, about driving, loading, and myself.